30 Day Shred

I started a new workout program, Jillian Michael's 30 Day Shred. I'm on my second day and I'm feeling muscles I haven't felt since before my car accident. I was worried my back was going to give me troubles as usual, but it's not too bad. Been having a few muscle spasms, but I'm managing it. 
Today after doing the workout I went for a bike ride on the trail. First ride of the season. It was tough!! The trail is still a bit squishy and it's hard to ride on that. But, I made it. I rode the bike, then got off and walked a ways, then did a run/walk back to the bike. I tell ya, my legs from the knees down were SCREAMING at me. It felt like someone had put the bottoms my legs in a meat grinder. The pain was so bad I almost threw up. Everything else was just fine, but from the knees down it was absolute hell. Once I got back to the bike I stretched... well, actually, I collapsed next to my bike and tried not to puke from the pain... then I stretched. After getting the pain to subside a bit I hopped back on the bike and headed back to town. After a few minutes on the bike the leg pain was gone and I made it home. Even though I was in so much pain, it was fun to get out there on the trail. I hope we continue having nice weather so the trail hardens up. I don't like riding in the squishiness :-P
This afternoon after I showered I decided I wanted to get some good "before" pics taken. Steve was home and the boys were gone so it was a good time to get them taken. I put on a sports bra and pair of spandex shorts and went downstairs for my photo shoot. Now, I know I'm overweight. But in my mind I still see myself as the lean, athletic 130 pounder I used to be. Reality slams into your head once you see pictures of yourself that are meant to show just how bad of shape you're really in. It's both depressing and inspiring at the same time to see myself as I truly am. Depressing that I got this way and inspired to not be this way anymore. I know that if I wouldn't have had that car accident, I wouldn't be in the shape I'm in today. But I'm not going to totally blame the accident. I could have worked through my "issues" in healthier ways. But instead I just gave up. I really did. I gave up on myself because ever since we moved to this town it had been one bad thing after another and I just gave up. The accident was the final blow and I just didn't give a flying fuck anymore. 
Things are changing though. I've been focusing on the positive things in life and doing my best to not let the negative get me down.  Life is way too short to piss around with negative people and things. :-)